Annabelle’s officially a month old.  She’s becoming her own little person.  She’s started to grasp onto our fingers with her hands, she’s smiling, and becoming more alert.  I love when she’s laying on me and napping, she’ll grab onto my finger (or when I put my finger into her hand, she’ll hold onto it).  And this week she’s started to smile, not necessarily because she thinks we’re funny but if I talk to her or kiss her on her nose she’ll give me a big ol’ grin.  She’s also started liking her pacifier just a little bit! For the first three weeks the only way she’d take the pacifier was if you’d hold it in her mouth and then after a minute she’d spit it out.

She still really likes being held or in other words, dislikes being in her swing or laying down or anywhere else (especially in the afternoon before Dusty gets home) and there were a few days this week I walked around the apartment with her in the baby carrier.  She liked being held and I was able to get a few things done.

Annabelle and I are starting to get into a routine.  I’m not sure if routine is the right word but let’s just say that I’m starting to understand her wants and needs, and am able to predict them a little better.  Our nice little routine will change once again when I go back to work though but I’m enjoying it while I can.

Last weekend we took Annabelle to her first wedding, and we stayed in the back of the church for most of the ceremony because she was a bit hungry and didn’t want to sit quietly.  I’m realizing how a child’s eating and napping schedule can really determine what you’re going to be doing or not doing.

Annabelle’s sleeping just like a one month old, sporadically.  One day she slept for four hours in the evening.  And then did it again a few days later but most of her naps last an hour (or less).  And she wakes up every three hours in the middle of the night.  A friend gave me a book while I was pregnant on getting your infant to sleep through the night and I finally read it.  It was a great reference to how things could be if you had the perfect baby or the perfect parents but sadly she is not (although we adore her all the same) and neither are we.  I promptly put the book down, called my girlfriends with children and asked how they did it.  Let’s just say that after talking to them, I feel much better.  As with any piece of advice, I’m taking it with a grain of salt and using what information I can, as the best I can.  It has made me want to read more about raising children, just to see what the professionals are saying.

Venturing out for Annabelle’s first wedding wasn’t the only thing we did outside of the house this week, we also went on a lot of walks over the pedestrian bridge, met up with two other new mommies and their two little guys for a walk and some frozen yogurt, and then Dusty, Annabelle and I went to a vineyard with some friends.

So, it’s been a month and we’re starting to live life as a family of three.  Dusty’s officially back to work in full force, working hard to launch Flywheel and move it out of Beta (which they did today).  This week I started adjusting to being a wife, and now mother, with an entrepreneurial husband, and Dusty’s adjusting to being an entrepreneurial dad.  We’ve been married for six years and I’ll admit that it took us both a while to adjust to him not working you’re typical job, and now we’re adjusting again.

Each week is getting easier than the next.  Yay!!!  This week’s picture was taken in the same outfit we brought her home in.  She fits into it so much better now that she’s gained a little weight!

We’ve had a lot of people ask if we have a nickname for Annabelle and if we’ll be calling her Anna or Belle or Elle or Annabelle.  We haven’t really decided what she’ll go by as far as a shortened version of her name but we do have a few nicknames.  As many of you know, we’ve always called our little girl “bambino”.  Bambino is Italian for “baby” or “infant” of either sex.  The feminine is “bambina” but for some reason we never got into calling her “bambina” once we found out we were having a girl.  So, our nickname for Annabelle started out as “bambino” and has morphed into “bino” or “beans” depending on what kind of mood we’re in.  Dusty also likes calling her “Mrs. B” which comes from him calling me “Mrs. D”.

Our motto is still “go with the flow”.  We’re feeding her when she’s hungry, we’re letting her sleep when she wants to sleep.  For those that know me, I’m a little OCD as well as a planner but choosing to not put her on a strict schedule has worked really well for us.

For us though, going with the flow doesn’t mean we’re not making plans.  We’re still doing things, like going to a one-year old birthday party and going to a Labor Day picnic and taking her with me to Book Club and taking her to Whole Foods for date night, but we understand that if it doesn’t happen the way we planned, it’s still alright, we just improvise.  I’m learning fast that feeding Annabelle can really control what’s happening and when because she eats so often.  For example, when the three of us went to Whole Foods, just as we were getting ready to go inside she got fussy (it was getting to be dinner time for her) so we headed back to the car so Annabelle could have a quick snack.  As a side note though, none of this means I don’t dream about the day she’s on some kind of schedule and we can predict with some kind of accuracy when she will eat and sleep.

When people ask how she’s sleeping my go to answer is that she’s great one night but the next she’s a little devil.  One night she’ll sleep for a stretch of three hours, get up to be fed and then fall right back to sleep.  And then the next she’ll want to be fed constantly and only wants to sleep in our arms or not at all.

Annabelle eats like a champ.  As I mentioned earlier, she’s not on a strict schedule but most days she’s eating every 2 hours or so with some shorter or longer times in between.  I’ve started reading as much as I can on pumping and asking all of my girlfriends about what they’ve done.  I’m already thinking to myself that I’m going back to work in five weeks and I want to make sure it’s a smooth transition, and that Annabelle doesn’t go hungry.

This week Annabelle and I started getting a little air!  It finally cooled down and we went on walks through the Old Market and down by the river and park almost every day.  It’s a great release for me because we get out of the apartment and I get some exercise as well.  It’s also nice because on Annabelle’s bad days, when she only wants to be held, I get a small break and she absolutely loves being in the stroller, often falling asleep.  I’ve been walking around 4 miles or about an hour each day and it makes me excited to be able to exercise for “real” and hopefully will make the transition back into a more rigorous exercise routine easier.  Friday I met up with another friend of mine who’s a new mommy for a walk and we were able to chat about new mommy stuff which was another great release for me.

I’m still catching up.  Annabelle is officially 3 weeks old but that’s life as a parent, always late (and I’ve never been really good at being on time).  Here is our picture of sweet Annabelle at two weeks.  Dusty picked her outfit again this week.  She’s wearing a Flywheel onsie (a tribute to Dusty’s company).

This second week was much better than the first.  There’s no way to express how much better week two was for us, or just how hard week one really was. I’m not sure if I could have survived another week with such little sleep or so much breastfeeding.

What made a big difference from week one to week two was that we broke some of the rules (really we stopped listening to everything we read or heard) and just went with what worked best.  Our philosophy has always been to do what works best for us, but as new parents, it’s sometimes hard to know what to do and what not to do when you get so many conflicting pieces of advice  (as I mentioned from week one).  Now when I read something or hear something that doesn’t work for us I just save that piece of information in the back of my brain because it might be useful later on.

The first major change since last week is that we started getting more sleep.  Now, it’s not amazing sleep that lasts a full 8 hours but I’m pretty sure there weren’t any nights where you found Dusty or I sleeping in the rocking chair or on the floor in the nursery.  I don’t think I mentioned it but we’re keeping her in a bassinet (or trying at least) in our room unless she gets really fussy and then one of us takes her to her room so the other can get some sleep.

Dusty went back to work this week as well.  Our original plan was for him to go into work in the mornings and work from home in the afternoons but we realized that we were both getting enough sleep that him coming home in the afternoon didn’t make sense.  It was a little scary that first day he was back to work and I was all-alone but we all survived.

For the most part, this week all I did was feed Annabelle, change her dirty diapers, try to take a quick nap when she was snoozing, and try to keep up with some of the small things around the house (if there was time).  This last thing didn’t happen very often and sometimes if it did, it was an unsuccessful attempt.  During week two I was even able to shower a couple of times before Dusty got home (a big accomplishment for me) and even took Annabelle to meet all of my Book Club friends one night.  Going to Book Club was our first outing without Dusty!

Breastfeeding has gotten much easier this week.  Some of my friends have asked me what I feared most about having Annabelle and my answer was always breastfeeding.  I’ve had some friends who have had a really difficult time with nursing and I always felt this was the one thing I really wanted to be able to do but knew I might not have any control over.  The first week it took a little extra time for my milk to come in so Annabelle was always hungry and just not getting as much to eat as she probably wanted (and I was anxious and always thinking about it) but this second week she’s been putting on the ounces and at her two week check up weighed in at 8 pounds 3 ounces (up from her 7 lbs 9 oz at birth).  Things are getting much better but it’s still an adjustment, getting used to being the only person that can feed her (at the moment).

I’m also going to pump but someone in the hospital (I can’t remember if it was our pediatrician or a nurse) recommended that we wait at least three weeks before pumping and introducing a bottle to Annabelle.  Of course, everyone, including the internet had different advice for us but Annabelle and I are still getting into a rhythm, so this seems to be the right decision for us (although I did try pumping once this week so that we could go out for my birthday and it’s made me glad we’re not rushing it).

We had a lot of friends and family visit again this week and so Annabelle is still having a hard time getting into a routine (if this can happen at two weeks old).  And another big thanks to those friends of our who brought us food, it was greatly appreciated.

This week we also ventured out of the apartment and as a family of three took a few strolls around the Old Market.  This was another one of those moments that we all of a sudden realized that we are now parents and things are going to be different (very similar to our experience at the pediatrician).  Dusty and I got outside with the stroller and Annabelle, looked at each other and smiled.  We had one of those, “who’s going to push the stroller, oh my goodness we have a stroller… and a baby” moments!  Annabelle loves living in the Old Market and even spent her first evening at one of our and her soon-to-be favorite spots, La Buvette.

Our biggest milestone this week was leaving Annabelle with Grandma Jane for almost three hours while we went to dinner to celebrate my birthday.  I tried for the first time and successfully pumped a few ounces of milk, and we were able to leave her for a few precious hours for our first meal alone.  It was a special birthday dinner!

I’m a few weeks behind but I plan to write weekly updates now that our bambino has arrived.  I’m not sure at what point I’ll transition from weekly updates to monthly updates and then eventually to quarterly or yearly updates but for right now I’m going to write a few things down each week to share with everyone (and to help us remember the small things) about what’s going on with our dear little Annabelle and her parents.  This first outfit was chosen by Dusty and is a tribute to Annabelle’s favorite guy in her life, her daddy!

So many things happened during our first week of parenthood yet so little.  First, a big thank you to everyone for all of your help during this first week and second and third.  We have some of the best family and friends who helped get us through these first couple of weeks.  I can’t thank my mom and mother-in-law enough for coming over a couple of times this first week to watch Annabelle while Dusty and I took naps and recharged a little.  And thanks to everyone who came to visit us in the hospital and at home.

And an even bigger thanks to our friends who brought us food! I’m forever going to do this for any new mommies and daddies I know (and feel so guilty I never did it before).  I never realized how glorious this small gesture could be.

And now for what our first week looked like.  We had our little bambino on Friday and were in the hospital until Sunday.  These were the easy days.  We had some of the best nurses (and doctors) who took such good care of Annabelle as well as mommy (and daddy) that I didn’t want to go home.

The rest of the week was spent in our apartment (we only left to go to the pediatrician) trying to figure out life with a newborn.  We learned a lot this first week (and still have a lot more to learn) but Dusty and I are doing it together and it makes the adventure so much more fun (or maybe just more tolerable)!  This first week Dusty was so supportive and the best dad.  Without him I would have had a lot more emotional breakdowns but he was so great at being encouraging and knowing the exact things I needed.

Here are just a few highlights from Annabelle’s first week and our first week as parents:

Watching Dusty and Annabelle together. During some of these sleepless nights Dusty would go on “adventures” with Annabelle, walking around the apartment, describing everything from the books on our bookshelves to the food truck across the street to all of the bottles of wine we have.  I love seeing Dusty as a dad.  I’ve never seen him hold a baby and watching him cuddle and care for our little girl makes me love him even more.  I have a feeling Annabelle is going to be daddy’s little girl.

Going to the pediatrician. Dusty and I went to the pediatrician, looked around at all of the parents and their children, and then had a stark realization that we were like all of those people. Yes, we are parents.  It was such a weird feeling, I looked around and thought, “we’re not like those people” and then looked over at Annabelle and said to myself, “yes, we are like those people… we’re parents!” For the longest time we’ve identified with those couples that don’t have children, that can go out whenever they want, do whatever they want and have no cares in the world.  Our world has turned upside down!

Not sleeping.  This most definitely is not a highlight of our first week.  I knew we’d get very little sleep these first few weeks but this first week was really hard.  Annabelle wasn’t sleeping much and had a her nights and days switched around.  Of course, people say to sleep when baby sleeps but we had so many guests stopping by that it was almost impossible to sleep during the day and although Dusty was home with us this first week, he still worked and so we both were zombies.  There were a few early mornings I woke up to find Dusty napping on the nursery floor and Annabelle sleeping in her bassinet.

Learning to be parents.  Dusty and I are pretty darn smart but learning to be parents as well as learning what is right for your specific child is hard work.  So many people (including the internet) have ideas, suggestions, and stories about what you should and shouldn’t do that it can be really hard to decide what works for you.  There have been several times this first week as well as following weeks where someone has told me something (or I’ve read about) and then I’ve started wondering if I should be doing something different, was doing something wrong, or if I should be doing something at all.  I know that we’re doing a great job and Annabelle is quite happy with all of our parenting decisions (at least I think so) but wow, there a lot of conflicting information out there!  As far as parenting goes though, I think Dusty and I are a great pair and we’re figuring it out together!

Our roles as parents. My primary role is feeding our darling little girl and Dusty’s primary role is diaper changer (and supportive husband).  All Annabelle has done this first week (and weeks to follow) is eat, sleep (infrequently) and dirty her diaper. Dusty and I didn’t realize that since I was breastfeeding that this would mean I am the primary care-giver, which is both a blessing and a curse.  I love all of the bonding I get with her and the connection we are making but it also makes it impossible to let someone else care for her, especially during this first week when she’s hungry all the time (and breastfeeding is still new and difficult).

It also makes it a little difficult as a new dad because Dusty can’t do a lot for Annabelle.  There have been times when I just needed some sleep and Dusty wants to help but the only thing that will soothe Annabelle is to be fed.  This first week Dusty has been a trooper though, taking care of Annabelle when I went to get my hair done and was gone for 2.5 hours (remember how I mentioned that sometimes nothing soothed her but being fed–yep, that happened while I was gone), changing most of her diapers, and taking care of me while I’ve been recuperating.